Letters I've Written (Never Meaning to Send)
by BeChloeIsLegit
Summary: Prompt from ThatWeirdoHannah on : One of the Bellas wrote letters to put their feelings out of their head, a sort of venting process but never had any intention of letting them be seen by anyone else. One day they're found and are given to the person(s) they're about. Rated M mainly for language.
1. Chapter 1

**LETTERS I'VE WRITTEN  
( NEVER MEANING TO SEND)**

**CHAPTER 1**

_**Prompt from ThatWeirdoHannah**_**:** _One of the Bellas wrote love letters to put their feelings out of their head, a sort of venting process, but never had any intention of letting anyone else see them. One day they're found and are given to the person(s) they're about. _

_You can choose who the writer is and who they're for. I want to see what you'd do with an idea like this."_

_**A/N**__: It's taken forever, but here it is. I hope you enjoy it._

* * *

Beca threw her keys in the bowl on the side table as she walked into her house. She used her foot to close the door as she shuffled through her mail.

"Bill, bill, bill, junk," Beca said as she checked each piece of mail. "Hmm, wonder what this is?"

Beca set the other mail on the table and looked closer at the larger envelope in her hands.

"Barden, Georgia," Beca mumbled, seeing the postal marking. "Probably from Stacie."

Beca opened the envelope to find a bundle of letter-size envelopes held together with a rubber band and a folded note. She walked over to the sofa and sat down, placing the envelopes on the coffee table. Beca unfolded the note and began reading.

"_Hey, Beca:_

_I hope this finds you well. I heard your latest song, and it was amazing! You have to get me Kelly Clarkson's autograph. I love her!_

_Anyway, I thought you might want to read what's in this envelope. Don't be mad; Chloe doesn't know I sent them to you, but I do think you should read them._

_FYI - I did not read them. They are still sealed, but they do have your name on them. If Aubrey or Chloe finds out that I've sent them to you, I am dead._

_Call me if you want to talk about whatever is in these envelopes. Miss you!_

_Stacie"_

Beca threw Stacie's note on the table and pulled the first envelope out of the stack; her name was written on the front. She held the letter using both hands. She wanted to open it but was hesitant. She thought back to the last thing she heard Chloe say.

Beca gave a small, sad laugh because the words weren't spoken to her, but about her. It was three years ago, and Beca remembered it as if it were yesterday.

"_Hey, Stacie," Beca called out to her fellow Bella. "Have you seen Chloe?"_

"_Um, I think she's over there," Stacie said, pointing to a far corner of the room._

_Beca thanked her and made her way through the drunken horde until she saw Chloe leaning against the wall, talking to her "friend," Tom. She was about to interrupt them when Tom started talking. Beca stood back, waiting for an opportunity to get Chloe alone so she could tell her the good news._

"_Come on, Chloe," Tom whined as he put his hands on Chloe's hips. "For old time's sake."_

"_I said no, Tom," Chloe said. It was obvious she was slightly irritated as she pushed his hands off her._

"_Is this because of that girl?" Tom asked._

"_What girl?" Chloe asked._

"_That Beca girl," Tom said. "The one in the shower. She is hot. I'll give you that. It was obvious you two were attracted to each other."_

"_You're crazy," Chloe said with a shaky laugh. "She's a friend and a Bella. And that's all."_

"_I don't know," Tom said with a smirk. "You two seem really close." He raised and lowered his eyebrows suggestively. "Are you doing her? Is that why you won't go home with me? She can join us; I don't mind."_

"_Don't be ridiculous," Chloe said. "I admit she's hot, but she' a Freshman, I'm a Senior. She's just a child. Why would I want to 'do' her as you so eloquently put it?"_

_Beca's heart sank, and tears sprang to her eyes. "So, that's what Chloe thinks of me," Beca muttered to herself. "She sees me as a child and no one she would want to be with. Good to know."_

"_Sorry," Tom said, raising his hands in surrender. "My mistake."_

"_I have to go," Chloe said and started walking away from Tom._

_Beca hid behind a guy until she knew Chloe wouldn't see her. She pushed through the crowd and out the back door._

_Beca stood on the back porch, trying, unsuccessfully, to keep her tears from falling. She slowly walked down the steps and made her way to her dorm._

_Beca packed everything up that night and went to her dad's. He answered his door to find his daughter standing there with tears running down her face. He pulled her into a hug and held her._

_Once Beca stopped crying, she begged her father to help pay for her to go to L.A. He was really good about it all. He went to her dorm room and got all her stuff and brought it back to the house._

"_Chloe was standing outside your dorm room when I got there," her dad told her when he got back._

"_Really?" Beca said. "Why?"_

"_She said she hadn't seen or heard from you since the party last night," her dad said. "She was worried about you."_

"_What did you, um, tell her?" Beca asked._

"_That I hadn't seen you," her dad replied. "But, if I did, I'd tell you she was looking for you."_

"_Thanks," Beca said, sounding relieved. "If she or any of the other Bellas ask about me, don't tell them where I am. Please?"_

_Her father reluctantly agreed, and she stayed with him until he drove her to the airport two days later with a promise that he would ship her stuff to her once she was settled._

_Several of the Bellas, including Chloe, had texted and called, but Beca ignored them. The first thing she did when she got to L.A. was to get a new phone number. She never looked back._

_Now, here it was three years later, and Beca was a Grammy-winning singer and producer._

Beca shook her head to clear the memories and once again looked at the envelope in her hand. She opened it and pulled out a letter; it was dated the day she left Barden to move to LA. And it was from Chloe.

_"What the Hell, Beca? You just up and disappear without even a goodbye? You don't know how much that hurt the Bellas and me._

_No one knows when you left or why. Although I can guess why."_

"I highly doubt that," Beca muttered as she continued reading.

_"I assume you went to LA, where you always talked about wanting to go. I hope it's true. I just wished you had said goodbye._

_I've cried every day since you left. I miss you so much, and I can barely function. I can't fathom why my best friend would leave days before my Graduation. You promised to be there, and now I don't even know where you are. This is the first promise you've broken; you once said if you promised to do something, it was guaranteed to be done. Why now? Why did you break your promise?_

_There was something I wanted to tell you at Graduation. Something I had been keeping to myself but had finally decided to tell you. I love you, Beca. I'm in love with you. I have been for a while._

_I guess if you could walk away without looking back, you don't feel the same way about me. I can live with that, but I thought we were at least friends. Did I do something? If I did, I am so, so sorry. I would never do anything to hurt you intentionally; you have to believe that._

_If it wasn't something I did, what was it? You know you could have talked to me about whatever it was that happened to make you leave. I've always been here for you, and you should have talked to me. Maybe I could have helped you with whatever it was, and you'd still be here._

_Don't forget me. I hope one day you can find it in you to reach out and we can be friends again._

_I'm going to write to you at least once a month, but I won't be sending these to you. It's more to help me get over you and move on._

_Chloe_

_PS - I do love you, Beca, and I'm sorry I didn't tell you while you were still talking to me."_

"She loved me," Beca laughed. "Yeah, right."

Beca scoffed as she put the letter back in the envelope. She set the letter down and looked at the other letters. She let out a heavy sigh and got up and went to the kitchen. She pulled out some leftover Chinese takeout and placed it in the microwave to reheat.

As Beca stood, waiting for her food to heat, she thought back to three years before when she was at Barden University. She hadn't wanted to go, but her parents made her. She both loved it and regretted it at the same time.

Beca loved being at Barden because she gained a family when she joined the Barden Bellas. They were as close as sisters.

Beca was startled out of her memories when the microwave beeped, letting her know her food was ready. She carefully removed the dish, grabbed a fork, and a beer before going back to the sofa.

Beca carefully set her hot food on the coffee table and opened her beer. She took a drink, all the while staring at the letters.

"_I wonder how many letters are here_," Beca thought. She pulled another envelope from the stack and opened it. It was dated three months after she left Barden to move to L.A.

"_Hey, Becs,_

_It's been three months since you left without a word, and I hope this finds you well._

_I miss you. It hasn't been the same for me since you left. I know you wanted to pursue your dream, but I never thought you'd cut me, or the Bellas, out of your life so easily, or so permanently. I mean, I thought we were friends, Becs. Best friends in my book._

_Not much more, I can think to say. I hope you find whatever it is you're looking for._

_Your friend (I hope),_

_Chloe_

_PS - I still love you and really do miss you!"_

Beca grabbed her beer and chugged it down. She swallowed the last bit and slammed the bottle on the table.

"Chloe loved me," Beca muttered, and gave a humorless chuckle as she added, "She sure had a funny way of showing it."

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

Meanwhile, two-thousand miles away, Aubrey came home from a date with Stacie to find Chloe, sitting on the floor frantically tearing through the boxes she had stored in the storage closet just off the dining room.

"Chloe, what are you doing?" Aubrey asked.

"I can't find them," Chloe said, wiping a tear that ran down her cheek. "I don't know what happened to them."

"Find what, sweetie?" Aubrey asked as she knelt next to Chloe and pulled her into a hug.

"My letters," Chloe said. She lowered her voice before adding, "The ones I've been writing to Beca."

"Chloe," Aubrey said with a sigh. "I thought you said you had moved on from Beca. You said that this Chicago guy might be just what you need to get over her."

"I know," Chloe said, looking down at her hands. "But, I can't forget about her, Brey. I still love her. Even though she left without a word and hasn't contacted us in three years, I want to see her. I need to see her. I want to know what I did wrong."

"I know Stacie knows where she is," Aubrey said. "It's been three years for God's sake. I'm sure there's some sort of time limit on keeping her actual whereabouts to herself. We'll ask her if she knows why Beca left without a word. You need closure, and you're not going to be able to move on until you get it."

"Thanks, Brey," Chloe said, wiping at her face. "It still doesn't answer the question of where my letters are. I've only been here a week; they can't have gotten lost in that little bit of time."

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

Aubrey and Chloe woke the next morning and drove to Barden to talk to Stacie. They walked into the Bellas house and greeted the girls who were sitting around the living room.

Stacie walked over to Aubrey and gave her a quick kiss.

"Hey, babe," Stacie said with a smile. "Did I forget a date or something?"

"No, you're good," Aubrey said, smiling at her. "We wanted to know if you have a few minutes? Chloe would like to talk to you."

"Sure, come into the kitchen," Stacie said. "Girls, give us some privacy and don't come in, okay?"

"Okay," the girls all called out.

Stacie moved toward the kitchen, and Aubrey and Chloe followed. They sat at the counter as Stacie went to the refrigerator.

"Would you like something to drink?" Stacie offered.

"I'd like some water," Chloe said.

"Same," Aubrey said.

Stacie got three bottles of water from the refrigerator and set them on the counter. She sat down and opened one of the bottles, taking a sip before asking, "Um, so what's up?"

"Do you remember seeing a bunch of envelopes held together by a rubber band when you helped us pack my stuff the other day?" Chloe asked.

"Envelopes?" Stacie said, furrowing her brows as she thought about how to answer. "Um, no, not that I recall. Why are they important or something?"

Chloe sighed and put her head in her hands.

"You still talk to Beca, right?" Aubrey asked.

"Um, yeah," Stacie said quietly. "You know that. What does she have to do with this?"

"Can you help Chloe get in touch with her?" Aubrey asked.

"That depends," Stacie said suspiciously. "Why do you want to know?"

Chloe and Aubrey looked at each other. Aubrey turned to look at Stacie.

"Chloe wants to clear the air with her," Aubrey said. "She, um, needs closure, and the only way she can get that is if she can talk to Beca. So, will you help Chloe or not?"

Stacie looked at Chloe. "Before I answer that, tell me what you plan to say to Beca? She's still my best friend, and if you plan to break her heart again, I won't help you."

"Again?" Chloe asked, a confused look on her face. "What do you mean _again_?"

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

Beca woke the next morning, groaning as she tried to sit up. She flopped back down and looked around, noticing she was on the sofa and still in her clothes from the day before.

"I must have fallen asleep while reading Chloe's letters," she muttered as she looked at the items strewn across the coffee table. "Or maybe the beers and tequila had something to do with it.

Beca licked her lips and ran her tongue over her teeth. "Gross," she mumbled. "Why did I drink beer_** and **_tequila last night?"

Beca knew she needed to get up and drink some water.

"Thank God it's Saturday," Beca said as she finally managed to sit up and put her head in her hands. "Oh, God."

Beca gave herself a minute to get herself together before attempting to stand. She got up and had to keep herself from falling over by grabbing the back of the sofa. She felt nauseous and took a couple of deep breaths before she managed to right herself.

"Let's see if I can get to the bathroom without killing myself," Beca mumbled as she slowly pushed away from the sofa. She slowly shuffled her way down the hall to the bathroom. She held onto the wall and wondered when the hallway had become so long.

Beca reached the bathroom door when she heard her phone started ringing. "Shit," she muttered. Her phone was still in the living room. She paused for a moment, torn between getting the phone or going into the bathroom.

"Fuck it," Beca said and went into the bathroom.

It was over an hour later when Beca made her way back into the living room. After throwing up twice, and taking a relaxing shower, she felt like she could face whatever came her way.

The first thing she did when she returned to the living room was to check her phone.

"Jesus, Stacie," she mumbled when she saw Stacie had called and texted about a dozen times in the past hour.

Stacie had left only one voicemail, and Beca decided to listen to it first.

"_Hey, Beca, it's Stacie. I, um, sent you an envelope and I need you to send it back to me when you get it. Don't open it. Please? Do not open it. Just send it back. I made a mistake sending it to you. Call me, and we can talk about it."_

The voicemail ended, and Beca looked at the letters still sitting on the coffee table. "Sorry, Stacie, but you were too late," Beca muttered to herself.

Beca pulled up her text thread with Stacie. The texts basically said the same thing as her voicemail. She shook her head and threw her phone on the table.

"I need coffee if I'm going to deal with this shit," Beca mumbled. She got up and went to the kitchen to start the coffee maker. While she waited for it to be ready, she went back to the living room and picked up one of the letters she had already read.

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

"The reason Beca left Barden so abruptly," Stacie said. "Was because of you."

"Me?" Chloe asked, even more confused. "What did I do?"

"You broke her heart, Chloe," Stacie said sadly. "She liked you, and she said she overhead something that made her realize you, um." Stacie stopped and took in a deep breath. "You know what? It's not for me to tell you. I'll talk to Beca and see if she wants to talk to you. If she says yes, I'll help you get in touch with her."

"Thank you," Chloe said, sincerely. "I don't know what I could've said to make her leave without saying goodbye. I thought we were on good terms."

"As I said," Stacie said. "She needs to be the one to tell you, not me."

"Okay," Chloe said. "I'll wait to see if she wants to talk to me."

"Good," Stacie said. She looked down at the table and said, "Now, I have a confession to make to you."

Stacie took in another deep breath and slowly let it out.

"Spit it out, Stacie," Aubrey said. "What do you need to confess?"

"I lied about not seeing the envelopes," Stacie said. "I found them and took them."

"Why would you take them?!" Chloe shouted, jumping up from her chair. "They were mine and none of your business!"

"They had Beca's name on them," Stacie said, her voice laced with anger. "She is my best friend, so it is my business. I didn't know what was in them, but I thought she should see them, so I mailed them to her."

"Oh, my God!" Chloe yelled and started to pace around the kitchen. "Why would you do that? This is bad. This is really bad."

Aubrey stood and grabbed Chloe by the shoulders. "Chloe, calm down," Aubrey told her. "This might be a good thing. She'll read them and know how you feel about her. Maybe she'll reach out to you."

Chloe wiped a tear from her eye. "You don't understand, Brey. When I first started those letters, I told her I loved her in every one of them. But, then after I met Chicago, I couldn't stop thinking about how he wasn't who I wanted. I got angry again at her leaving, and I wrote some things that were never meant to be said to her."

"What kind of things?" Stacie asked.

"I'm not telling you," Chloe said as she sank back down into her chair. "Those letters were never meant to be read by her or anyone else. They were for me. I was using them to work through how I felt about her, especially her leaving the way she did, how I couldn't understand why she cut off all communication. In one of the last letters, I told her I hated her, and I was glad she was gone."

Chloe let out a sob, and Aubry pulled her into a hug.

"Oh, crap," Stacie said. "I need to call Beca. She'll be hurt if she reads that you hate her."

"I don't hate her," Chloe mumbled. "I was angry when I wrote that. I apologized in the very next letter. I also told her goodbye and wished her the best."

"I'm still going to call her. Knowing Beca, she would stop reading after she read that you hate her," Stacie said as she pulled her phone out of her pocket and called Beca's number. "Shit," she said when it went to voicemail. She decided to leave a message.

"_Hey, Beca, it's Stacie. I, um, sent you an envelope and I need you to send it back to me as soon as you get it. Don't open it. Please? Do not open it. Just send it back. I made a mistake sending it to you. Call me, and we can talk about it."_

Aubrey and Chloe watched as Stacie texted Beca as well. "I'll keep trying until I reach her," Stacie said, looking down at her phone. she looked up at Chloe with a pained expression on her face. "I'm so sorry about taking those letters, Chloe. I thought they would help Beca get past whatever it was you said to make her leave."

"Thanks, Stacie," Chloe said. "If you reach her, please tell Beca I'm sorry about whatever it was I supposedly said. And, I'm also sorry about what I said in those letters if she's read them."

"I will, Chloe," Stacie said. "I promise."

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

"_I wonder what's in these letters to make Stacie beg me not to read them_?" Beca asked herself as she sat once again, staring at the letters.

Beca picked up each of the letters that she had already opened. She quickly glanced at one before looking at the next.

"They all have that she's in love with me," Beca muttered to herself. "Could that be it? Stacie doesn't want me to know that Chloe's in love with me?"

Beca quickly made her way through the last few. "But why would that matter to her? Maybe she's trying to protect me from getting hurt again."

Beca got up and paced around her living room, thinking about Stacie's call and what it meant. She made her way to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water. She went to the living room and picked up her phone.

Beca pulled up her contacts and looked at Stacie's name for a minute before placing the phone on the table. She reached for an envelope near the end of the stack.

Beca took a breath; she and opened the envelope and pulled out the letter dated three weeks ago. Beca let out the sigh and began reading.

"_Beca,_

_I'm done, finished, not going to do this anymore with you because you're not worth it. When you first left, I tried to reach you, but you never responded. And then, you changed your number. I've bugged your father several times, and he won't give me your number or your address. I know Stacie knows it, but she's keeping it to herself as well. So, I'm done. I actually hate you, Beca. I have spent the past three years continuing to love you, and you obviously don't give a shit about me. Thanks for that, old friend."_

"Wow," Beca mumbled. "She isn't holding back now."

Beca let out a sigh and continued to read.

"_You must think you are so special, sitting out there in L.A in some mansion with your fans and paparazzi falling all over themselves trying to get your attention. It's too bad they don't know the real Beca Mitchell. The Beca I've known for four years who started off being nice and funny and willing to do anything for a friend. The Beca I fell in love with. But, in reality, you're selfish and shallow, thinking you're all that. Well, don't worry because you mean nothing to me, and I hate you, and I'm glad you left._"

"She must be pissed," Beca said with a sad smile and a tear running down her cheek. "She didn't even sign her name on this one."

Beca took a sip of her water and looked at the last letter, thinking if Chloe wrote her another one, maybe she got more off her chest. Beca reached for the final letter in the stack and opened the envelope. This letter was dated the day after the last one.

"_Beca,_

_I am so, so sorry. I didn't mean anything I said in that last letter. I hadn't realized how angry and hurt I still was, and the words came pouring out. As much as I hate to admit it, I still love you. You'll never see this, but it does make me feel better to apologize. These letters did what I had hoped they would do. It took me three years, but I think I'm over you enough to move on. I met this guy not too long ago, and we've gone out a couple of times. The only problem with him is he's not you. But, I think he might be someone I can have a future with; we'll see._

_Before I seal this, I want to reiterate what I said in some of my other letters. I will always love you, Beca. And I am so proud of you. I have never seen anyone so determined, and I always knew you would make it. You had a dream, and you didn't stop until you made that dream come true. I listen to your music all the time, and I love it. Congratulations!_

_So, my final words to you are that I wish you nothing but the best in all you do. I hope you're happy, and life treats you kindly. I will always love you, Becs, and I hope one day we might be friends again._

_Love, Chloe"_

Beca wiped a tear that fell down her cheek. "Well, damn," Beca muttered. "I thought I was doing fine without her in my life. But after reading this, she's made me want to see and talk to her again."

Beca started laughing. Chloe said she loved her music. What Chloe didn't know was that Beca had written a few songs about lost love, heartbreak, and such, and they were all about Chloe. Maybe it was time to bury the hatchet and talk to Chloe.

Beca pulled out her phone.


	2. Chapter 2

**LETTERS I'VE WRITTEN  
( NEVER MEANING TO SEND)**

**CHAPTER 2**

* * *

"We should probably go," Aubrey said, looking at Chloe. She turned to Stacie and said, "Thanks, Stacie."

Before Stacie could say anything, her phone pinged with a text. She glanced at her phone, and her eyes widened. "It's, uh, from Beca," Stacie said, looking down at her phone. "She wants me to call her."

"Oh," Chloe said. "We'll let you get to it."

Chloe and Aubrey stood, and Stacie stopped them.

"No, wait," Stacie said. "Stay. I think it's time you two talked to each other. I'll call Beca and see if she's calling about the letters. Then, we'll take it from there."

Aubrey and Chloe looked at each other. Aubrey nodded her head slightly, and Chloe let out a sigh. The two girls sat back down and looked at Stacie; Chloe nodded.

"Good," Stacie said with a smile and hit the call button.

"_Hey, Stacie," _Beca said as she answered the phone. "_You were too late telling me to send you the envelope back. I had already started reading the letters._"

"Oh," Stacie said. "Um, so how do you feel about them?"

"_I was angry at first,"_ Beca said. "_But after reading the last two, I think I want to see her."_

"That's great, Beca!" Stacie said, looking at Chloe with a big smile on her face. "I know she'd like to talk to you."

Beca let out a small laugh. "_I don't think she does, Stacie,"_ Beca said. "_She told me she hated me and then in the next letter said she was sorry I want to clear the air about why I left; maybe get some closure from it all. She, um, also said she was over me and had a new boyfriend."_

"Oh," Stacie said, still looking at Chloe. "I had forgotten about him."

When Stacie looked at her, Chloe mouthed, "_What is she saying_?"

"Hold on a sec, Beca," Stacie said, staring at Chloe. "There's someone here who wants to talk to you."

Stacie held the phone out to Chloe. Chloe pushed it away, shaking her head and mumbling, "no, no."

"Go ahead, Chloe," Aubrey said. "You said you wanted to talk to her. Now's your chance."

Chloe's eyes were wide, and she was afraid. She didn't know what Beca would say to her, nor did she know what she would say to Beca.

Stacie held the phone out to Chloe and raised her eyebrows. Chloe sighed and reached for the phone.

Aubrey walked over to Stacie and put her arm around her shoulders; Stacie wrapped her arm around her waist.

"_Stacie?_" Beca's said. "_Stacie, what's going on? Are you still there? Hello_?"

"Um, hey, Beca," Chloe said. _"_It's Chloe."

"_Oh, um_," Beca said, surprised. "_Hey, Chloe_."

"Can we talk?" Chloe asked.

"_Um, yeah, sure,_" Beca said. "_Do you want to start?_"

"Okay," Chloe said and took a deep breath. "Um, why did you leave without saying goodbye?"

Beca sighed into the phone. She knew the question was coming but didn't expect it to be the first thing Chloe asked.

"_You called me a child_," Beca said. "_I liked you and was going to ask you out. But, then, I heard you tell Tom that I wasn't someone you'd be interested in because I was still a child._"

"What?" Chloe exclaimed. "I never said that!"

"_Yes, you did!_" Beca said. "_I__** heard**__ you say it!_"

"No way, uh-uh," Chloe said, shaking her head, although Beca couldn't see her. Tears came to Chloe's eyes. "I don't know what you think you heard, but I would never say that."

"What is she saying?" Aubrey whispered to Chloe.

"She said I called her a child," Chloe said, holding the phone so Beca couldn't hear. "She said that I said I wasn't interested in her because she was a child. But I never said that."

"Ask her when she thinks you said it," Stacie suggested.

Chloe took a deep breath and wiped her tears. She put the phone back up to her ear and asked, "When did I supposedly say that?"

"_Remember that frat party the Bellas went to the week before your graduation?"_

"Yeah? Kind of."

"_You were talking to Tom,"_ Beca said. "_He was trying to get into your pants, and you told him no."_

"Oh, yeah," Chloe said. "I remember that; I told him no because I wasn't interested in him anymore."

"_That's right. That's what you told him,"_ Beca said. "_That's when he asked you if it was because of me. He asked you if you were __**doing**__ me, his words not mine, and that's why you turned him down."_

"Oh, my God," Chloe said, remembering the rest of what she said to Tom. "Beca, the other stuff I said to Tom didn't mean anything. I only said it because I wanted him to leave me alone. If I had said it was because of you, he would've kept after me, and I wasn't the least bit interested in him. I, I wanted to be with you. You can ask Aubrey. I went to find her after I left Tom."

Aubrey furrowed her brow and looked at Chloe. "What is she saying now?"

Chloe waved her hand at Aubrey to get her to stop talking.

"Beca?" Chloe said into the phone. "Are you still there?"

"_Yeah, I'm here_," Beca said quietly. "_I, um, I believe you. And I'm an idiot_."

"No, you're not," Chloe said, her voice soft. "But, you should have come and talked to me instead of just packing up and leaving."

"_You do remember who you're talking to, right?_" Beca asked with a self-deprecating laugh.

Chloe chuckled. "I remember. I thought we had agreed that as best friends we would talk to each other about everything."

"_I know,_" Beca said. "_But I was hurt and, honestly, heartbroken. I was in love with you, Chloe, and hearing you say those words shattered me._"

"You were in love with me?" Chloe asked, swallowing loudly.

"_Yeah. I kind of still am,"_ Beca said so softly that Chloe wasn't sure she heard right. "_But, that doesn't do me any good now. You have a boyfriend and see a future with him._"

"We've only gone out twice, Becs," Chloe said. "That does not make him my boyfriend. And, as I said in my letter, he's-" Chloe cut herself off and looked at Aubrey and Stacie, staring at her and listening with rapt attention. "Um, could you hold on a sec, Beca?"

"_Sure_," Beca responded.

"On second thought," Chloe said. "Can I get your number from Stacie and call you back once I get home?"

"_That's fine_," Beca said. "_Let me talk to Stacie and let her know it's okay._"

"I'll talk to you later," Chloe said and then held the phone out to Stacie. "She wants to talk to you."

"Hey, Beca," Stacie said into the phone. "I heard, and I'll make sure she gets it."

"_Thanks, Stacie_," Beca said. "_We're going to talk some more. Who knows, maybe things will work out, and she still feels the same way about me_."

"Maybe," Stacie said with a smile. "I'll call you later."

"_Okay_," Beca said. "_Oh, tell Aubrey I said hi._"

"I will," Stacie said with a laugh before ending the call.

Stacie pulled up her text messages and sent Beca's number to Chloe. "I just texted you Beca's number."

"Thanks, Stacie," Chloe said when she heard her phone ping. "And thanks for getting us to start talking again. You don't know what it means to me."

"You're welcome," Stacie said with a smile. "I hope everything works out for you."

"Me, too," Chloe said.

Chloe and Aubrey stood to leave. Stacie walked them to the front door and kissed Aubrey. Just as they were about to walk out, Stacie stopped them.

"Oh, babe," Stacie said. "I almost forgot, Beca said to tell you hi."

"Why would she do that?" Chloe asked Aubrey. "I thought you guys hated each other."

"We didn't always have the best relationship when she was here," Aubrey said. "But, just before she left, we found we had some things in common and started getting along. I guess it was her way of reaching out to me since she cut me off, too."

"Looks like Beca Mitchell may be coming back into all our lives," Chloe said with a smile. "Fingers crossed!"

Aubrey laughed as Chloe crossed her fingers; she did the same. "Yeah, fingers crossed!"

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

Chloe's confidence had waned considerably since she got back home. She was holding her phone and pacing, trying to decide what to say to Beca when she finally called her.

Chloe let out a sigh and pulled up Stacie's text to get Beca's number. She dialed the number and said, "Here goes nothing," just before hitting the call button.

"_Hello_?" Beca answered.

"Hey, Becs, it's, um, it's Chloe," Chloe said.

"_Hey_," Beca said. "_Um, before we start, I need to apologize to you. It was a dick move to leave like that without saying anything. And it was an even bigger dick move to ghost you for three years. Especially now that I know the true story behind what I overheard, who knows where we could've been by now. You were right, and I should have talked to you about what I heard. I'm really sorry, Chlo._"

Chloe smiled and wiped a tear from the corner of her eye. "I accept your apology, Becs. And I'm sorry, too. If I had known you heard what I'd said, I would have made you talk to me so I could explain."

"_Apology accepted,_" Beca said, then cleared her throat. "_So, um, tell me about your boyfriend. I'd like to know more about the guy who won your heart."_

"I'd rather hear about you," Chloe said, changing the subject. "Do you have any new music coming out? I loved your last song, by the way."

"_Thanks_," Beca chuckled. "_There might be some new music coming out soon._"

"Hey," Chloe said. "Are you going to be anywhere near Atlanta any time soon? I hoped we could meet up and talk in person."

"_I have to be in Atlanta next week," _Beca said. "_I'd like to get together so we can talk. Maybe we can move past what happened three years ago and talk about us and what the future holds. How does that sound, Chlo?"_

"I'd like that," Chloe said softly. "I'd like that a lot."

"_Great!_" Beca said. "_I promised Stacie to stay the week and hang out, and I'm busy Monday and Tuesday with work stuff. I should have some time from Wednesday on. Why don't you let me know a time that's good for you_."

"I already know my schedule is wide open," Chloe said. "Just let me know when you're free."

"_I will_," Beca replied. "_I have to go, but I'll, um, I'll call you tomorrow? Is that okay?_"

"Yes, that's fine," Chloe said. "I'll talk to you tomorrow, Becs. Bye."

"_Bye, Chlo_," Beca said and ended the call.

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

Chloe couldn't help her smile or tears as she hung up from talking to Beca. She was happy that she and Beca had talked and agreed to talk more in person. If Beca didn't have feelings for her, then they could be friends. Truth be told, Chloe thought she might want to be more than friends, but wasn't one-hundred percent sure that would happen. She also knew that she wanted Beca back in her life, so she would take what she could get.

Chloe sighed. She knew that nothing would be decided until she and Beca talked face-to-face.

Chloe was brought back to reality when her phone pinged with a text message. She gasped when she saw it was from Chicago; she had forgotten about him while she was talking to Beca. She opened the message.

Chicago: _Hey I know you had some stuff to do today but thought you might have time to go out to dinner. Give me a call when you're free_

Chloe read the message and was chewing on her bottom lip. Chicago was a nice guy, but now she wasn't sure if she should go out with him if she were hoping to get something started with Beca. But she wasn't sure if there was anything to get started.

"_One more date wouldn't hurt, right_?" she thought to herself. "_No sense in hurting him if I don't have to. If he asks me out again, I can put him off until after I talk to Beca and figure out what I'm going to do_."

Chloe pressed the call button, and Chicago answered on the third ring.

"_Hey_," Chicago's cheery voice came through the phone. "_I guess you got my message?_"

"Yeah," Chloe said. "Dinner sounds nice. There's something I need to talk to you about."

Chloe grimaced; she had not intended to say that. "_Oh,_" she thought. "_I guess I made up my mind on what I want to do_." She may have made up her mind, but she hadn't wanted to dump him over the phone.

"_Uh-oh,_" Chicago said. "_That doesn't sound good_."

"It's um," Chloe said and hesitated to continue. She cleared her throat and said, "You're a great guy, Chicago."

"_Wow, just as I thought,_" Chicago said. "_You don't want to see me anymore. May I ask why_?_ Is it something I did_?"

"No, no, this is on me. It's just that it's complicated," Chloe said softly. "I'm, uh, going through something right now. I need to get my head clear, and I don't want you to be collateral damage."

"_How long do you think you'll need?_" Chicago asked. _"I really like you, Chloe, and I'll wait for you if there's a possibility you might want to be with me once you get your head clear_."

"I don't know, Chicago," Chloe said. "I'm in love with someone else, and I need to see if they feel the same way. I don't want to lead you on in case things work out for me. I'm sorry."

"_Oh, I see_," Chicago said sadly. _"Uh, Chloe, if things don't work out, give me a call. I think we can be something special._"

"I can't promise anything," Chloe said. "I really am sorry."

"_Okay, then,_" Chicago said. "_Bye, Chloe. Good luck._"

Chicago ended the call before Chloe even said goodbye. Chloe threw her phone onto the table and ran a hand through her hair.

"That was not something I had wanted to do over the phone," Chloe mumbled. "I need a drink."

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

A couple of hours later, Chloe was still feeling bad about ending things with Chicago over the phone. She decided to use the letter-writing technique to help her get over her guilt. She was sitting at the kitchen counter with pen and paper when Aubrey walked in.

"Are you writing Beca another letter?" Aubrey asked.

"No," Chloe said. "This one is for Chicago. I, um, broke up with him over the phone, and I feel bad about it, so I'm writing to him to tell him what I couldn't tell him over the phone."

"Do you feel bad because you didn't want to break up with him?"

"No. I wanted to talk to him in person so I could explain. But when I called him, I blurted out that we needed to talk, and he guessed why and so I just did it."

"You're too soft for your good sometimes," Aubrey said. "Can I ask you something?"

"You can ask me anything," Chloe said, looking up from her writing.

"Do the letters help?" Aubrey asked. "Like, have you written letters to other people?"

"Yes," Chloe said. "I started when I was younger. I had an eating disorder, and my parents took me to a therapist. She could tell that I avoided confronting people who hurt me, so she suggested I write letters to those people. She said to put everything in the letters that I wanted to say to them in person but knew I never would and seal them away. So, I started, and it made me feel better."

"Wow," Aubrey said.

Chloe went back to writing, and Aubrey looked at her for a moment.

"Did you ever write me letters?" Aubrey blurted out and then blushed.

"Yes, I did," Chloe said.

"Can I read them?"

"No. That's not why they were written."

"Beca got to read hers."

"Not because I let her," Chloe said, looking at Aubrey. "I had no control over that. Stacie sent them to her; I wrote her a strongly worded letter about it, too."

Aubrey smiled at that. She stood, leaning against the counter, thinking.

"I've noticed you don't confront people even when they deserve it. I've seen you get upset with people, but you seem to blow it off rather quickly. Is that because you wrote letters?"

"Yes," Chloe said. "Once I've written a letter, I seal it in an envelope where it stays locked away and forgotten."

"You don't take them out and re-read them?" Aubrey asked, curious.

"No," Chloe said. "Once they are sealed away, I don't dwell on them. Plus, after a while, I usually destroy them. Whatever made me write to that person is forgiven and forgotten."

"But, you kept three years worth of letters for Beca," Aubrey said.

"Because all was not forgiven or forgotten," Chloe said. "Things have changed. I admit I was angry with Stacie for sending my letters to Beca without my permission. But, she did me a favor by doing that. We're talking again, and she wants to see me when she comes to Atlanta next week."

"I know," Aubrey said. "Stacie said Beca asked her to see if I would want to get together while she was here."

"Maybe we can invite her over here," Chloe said excitedly. "See if she wants to see the girls and invite them, too."

"Let's hold off on that," Aubrey said. "We can invite her over, but let's wait on inviting the rest of the Bellas. I don't want a big chaotic scene, and you know if the girls come, we won't have any alone time with Beca."

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

It was a week later, and Chloe couldn't sleep. She was excited that she was finally going to see Beca after three years. Her mind was racing with all the things she wanted to tell Beca.

Even though she was awake, Chloe was startled when her phone's alarm went off at seven. She reached for her phone to turn it off and decided to lay in bed for just a bit. She was awakened by a text message notification a little before nine.

Chloe grabbed her phone and saw that Beca had sent her a text.

Beca: _Hey, could you meet me for a coffee before I come to your place? I'd like for the two of us to talk before I see Aubrey. _

Chloe: _Sure. How about our favorite coffee place near Barden at 10:00 am? Do you remember where it is?_

Beca: _I remember and 10:00 is fine. I'll see you then._

Chloe jumped out of bed and ran to take a quick shower. Once done, she was glad she had already chosen an outfit to wear for the day. She hurried to get dressed and did her hair and makeup.

Chloe checked the time and decided to walk to the coffee shop. She could then ride with Beca and show her how to get to their apartment.

"Where are you going?" Aubrey asked, startling Chloe. "Beca's coming today."

"I know," Chloe said. "She texted and asked me to meet her for coffee first. I'm going now and will bring her back with me."

"Don't eat a lot," Aubrey said. "I have lunch all planned out, and there will be plenty."

"We won't," Chloe said and opened the apartment door. "I'll see you in a couple of hours."

"Make sure you're back here by one," Aubrey called out as Chloe was closing the door.

Chloe practically skipped to the coffee shop. When she arrived, she looked around but didn't see Beca. She ordered a coffee and waited.

Beca came rushing in a little after ten, and Chloe's face lit up. Beca looked amazing and even hotter than her pictures.

Beca looked around and smiled when she spotted Chloe. She hurried over to Chloe's table and stood next to it.

"Hey," Beca said.

"Hey," Chloe said.

"Sorry I'm a bit late."

"That's okay. I haven't been here long. Have a seat."

"Um, before I do, can I, um," Beca stopped and ran a hand through her hair. "I can't believe I'm asking this, but could I have a hug?"

Chloe squealed and jumped up; she grabbed Beca and pulled her into a hug. They both let out soft sighs and then laughed.

"I've missed you," Chloe whispered.

"I've missed you, too," Beca whispered back. "I've missed your hugs, too. There is absolutely nothing better than a Chloe Beale hug."

Chloe's smile widened, and she tightened her grip on Beca, bringing her closer. After a few minutes, the two pulled back from the hug and sat down. The waitress came over, and Beca ordered a coffee and a blueberry muffin.

"Do you want anything?" Beca asked Chloe.

"I'll have a muffin and more coffee, please," Chloe said. "Brey's making us lunch, so we can't overindulge."

"What kind of muffin would you like?" the waitress asked.

"Banana nut," both Beca and Chloe responded and then laughed.

The waitress smiled and said, "I'll be back in a few minutes."

"So, you remember I like banana nut muffins," Chloe said.

"I do," Beca said and smiled. "I remember a lot about you. I'm curious to know more about what might have changed. Like, do you still have those yellow ducky pajamas?"

Chloe scoffed. "Hey! I loved those pajamas. And, no, I don't still have them. I have a new pair."

They laughed and grew quiet as the waitress brought their coffee and muffins to the table. Both said thank you to the waitress, and she left them alone.

Chloe spent the better part of an hour talking to Beca about her music. At one point, Chloe was telling Beca how the first time she heard Beca on the radio she was driving and had to pull over because she got so emotional.

Beca laughed and looked at Chloe, smiling.

"What?" Chloe asked.

"God, I've missed talking to you," Beca said.

"I've missed talking to you, too," Chloe said.

"Dude, you're Beca Mitchell!" a voice said, causing the two to jerk their heads to the side to see a teenage girl and boy standing next to the table staring at Beca.

"Um, yeah, I am," Beca said with a chuckle.

"Can we get an autograph?" the girl asked quietly.

"And maybe a selfie?" the guy asked more enthusiastically.

"Um, sure," Beca said and looked at Chloe. "Sorry. This will only take a minute."

"It's fine," Chloe said and sat back to watch. She chewed on her bottom lip as she observed Beca with her fans. It hit home that Beca was famous, and people knew who she was. Seeing it in person was an eye-opening experience for Chloe. She wasn't sure what was going to happen, but she realized she didn't belong in Beca's world.

Once the picture was taken, the teenagers thanked Beca and hurried off, talking excitedly. Beca sat back down and looked at Chloe.

"I'm sorry, again," Beca said. "So, where were we?"

"Does that happen often?" Chloe asked.

"Depends on where I am," Beca said. "It happened a few times when I was in Atlanta. It's starting to happen more and more in LA. So, yeah, it does kind of happen often."

Beca took a sip of her coffee and picked at the muffin crumbs on her plate. "So, enough about me; let's talk about you. I, um, read the rest of your letters. I feel like I'm all caught up on your life. Some of the letters were very informative."

"I didn't want to rant at you in every letter," Chloe said, face slightly flushed. "I wrote things that I would have told you if you were here. It was a way of trying to get over my, um, romantic feelings for you and try to be your friend again."

"You told me you still love me in all of them," Beca said. "Well, all except the one where you said you hated me. How was writing that you loved me, getting over your feelings?"

"I don't know," Chloe said, looking down at her empty muffin plate. "I felt like since I still loved you, I wanted to tell you. I thought I'd stop writing it once I was no longer in love with you. I know it's weird, but it made sense to me at the time."

"So, how about now?" Beca asked.

"How about what now?" Chloe asked, somewhat confused.

"How do you feel about me now?"

"Oh. Um, I, uh, I," Chloe stammered and then blurted out, "I broke up with that guy I was seeing."

"Um, oo-kay," Beca said, slightly perplexed.

"I, um, broke up with him because," Chloe said and stopped. She took a deep breath and pushed down her anxiety over how famous Beca was and took the leap. "I told him I was in love with someone and wanted to see if anything would come of it."

Chloe let out the breath and chewed on her lower lip. She looked at Beca and watched as a big smile came to her face.

"Are you saying that you still love me?" Beca asked.

"Yes, I do," Chloe said. "So, how about you?"

"Yeah, I still love me, too," Beca said, trying to hold back a smile. "I am pretty fabulous."

"Beca," Chloe whined.

"I'm sorry," Beca said with a laugh. "I couldn't help it. You're so cute when you get frustrated with me." Chloe blushed as Beca continued, "And, FYI, I still love you, too. No, I'm still_** in love**_ with you."

Beca blushed and picked up her coffee cup, drinking down the last bit. She grimaced because it had grown cold.

Another tear came to Chloe's eye as she looked at Beca. "_I don't think I can do this,"_ Chloe thought.

The two old 'friends' were quiet as they both stared down at the table, lost in thought; Beca was first to break the silence.

"So, where do we go from here?"


	3. Chapter 3

**LETTERS I'VE WRITTEN  
( NEVER MEANING TO SEND)**

**CHAPTER 3**

* * *

Aubrey rushed to the door when she heard it open. "Where the hell have you-" Aubrey snapped her mouth shut when she saw Chloe walk in alone and tears running down her face.

Aubrey pulled the redhead into a hug, and Chloe sobbed into her chest. "What happened?" Aubrey asked softly.

Chloe could not answer; she just held Aubrey tighter. After about ten minutes, Chloe's sobs turned into hiccoughs, and Aubrey led her over to the sofa and sat her down. She handed Chloe several tissues, and Chloe wiped her face.

"Why don't you lie down and I'll make you some tea, okay?"Aubrey said.

Chloe nodded, and Aubrey turned and went into the kitchen. Chloe curled up on the sofa and wiped at the tears that didn't seem to want to stop.

Twenty minutes later, Aubrey placed a cup of hot tea on the table in front of her.

"Ready to talk about it?" Aubrey finally asked.

"Why do I continue to mess up where Beca is concerned?" Chloe cried.

"Oh, Chloe," Aubrey said and let out a sigh. "What happened?"

Chloe sat up and took a sip of her hot tea. She held the cup in her hands, soaking in the warmth.

Aubrey and Chloe sat quietly for a while until Aubrey couldn't take it anymore.

"Can you please tell me what happened?" Aubrey asked.

"I'm sorry," Chloe said. "Um, things started off great. When Beca got there, she asked for a hug, and you know how she was about hugs."

"She always let you hug her," Aubrey said with a smile.

"I know," Chloe said. "She said there was nothing like a Chloe Beale hug." Chloe laughed softly and wiped her tears. "She, um, also said she was still in love with me."

"What did you say?"

"I told her I was still in love with her, too."

"That's good, right?"

"No," Chloe said and looked at her. "Beca asked where did we go from here and I c-c-couldn't-" Chloe let out a sob; the words caught in her throat.

Aubrey put her arms around Chloe and held her until she calmed down again. Chloe pulled away from Aubrey and sipped her tea, trying to calm herself down.

Chloe let out a heavy sigh and looked down at her hands as she played with the tissues she was holding. Aubrey waited for Chloe to continue speaking. After about twenty minutes, Aubrey grew impatient again as Chloe continued to sit without saying anything.

"Chloe," Aubrey said, breaking the silence. "What did you tell Beca when she asked where you go from here?"

"I got scared, and I didn't know what to say," Chloe said. "So, I said that long-distance relationships are always a challenge." Chloe's voice softened as she said, " Beca said that was okay because she thought I was worth it."

"Sounds like she's in it for the long haul," Aubrey said with a smile. Chloe swallowed and wouldn't look at Aubrey. "Oh, there's more?" Chloe nodded. "So, what did you say next?"

"I told her that-"

The apartment door flew open, and an angry Stacie stormed in. Chloe and Aubrey's heads jerked up in surprise.

Stacie stomped over to Chloe and yelled, "What the fuck did you say to Beca?!"

Aubrey jumped up and stood in front of Stacie. "Babe, calm down! What happened?"

"Calm down?" Stacie said. "You want me to calm down? I just spent half an hour talking Beca off the ledge. She's ready to leave and never come back."

"What did Beca tell you?" Aubrey asked.

"She wouldn't tell me anything," Stacie said. "The only thing she said was that she was sorry she ever agreed to see Chloe."

Chloe let out a sob and laid her head on the arm of the sofa as the tears started again.

"What?" Aubrey asked, dumbfounded. She looked over to Chloe. "Chloe, look at me."

Chloe remained recumbent. Aubrey walked over to her. "Chloe, get up. We need to know what you told Beca."

"I swear to God, Chloe," Stacie said through clenched teeth. "You had better sit your ass up and tell us what you said to Beca."

Chloe was startled at the venom with which Stacie spoke to her. She slowly sat up but couldn't look at Aubrey or Stacie.

Aubrey sighed and pushed Stacie to sit in the chair across from the sofa. She walked over and sat next to Chloe. Aubrey looked at Stacie.

"Chloe just told me how she and Beca admitted they were still in love with the other," Aubrey told Stacie. "Beca then asked where did they go from here, and Chloe was just about to tell me what she said when you came in. Let her talk before you say anything. Okay?"

Stacie seethed for a bit before mumbling, "Fine." She sat with her arms crossed and refrained from saying anything else.

Aubrey gave her a small smile and turned to Chloe. "Chloe, what did you tell Beca?"

Chloe's mouth opened and closed a couple of times before she swallowed and cleared her throat.

"I, uh, told her that I didn't want to do a long-distance relationship."

Stacie scoffed and shook her head. Aubrey put a hand up to stop her from commenting.

"And what did she say?" Aubrey prodded.

Chloe proceeded to tell Aubrey and Stacie the rest of the conversation she had with Beca.

"_What?" Beca asked. "Does that mean you'd want to move to LA?"_

"_No, Becs," I told her. "I have a life here."_

_Beca sat back and ran a hand through her hair. I could see confusion in her eyes._

"_Do you want me to move back here?" she asked._

"_No, I wouldn't expect you to do that," I told her and reached for her hand. She pulled it away as if she had been burned._

"_Then what the fuck was the reason behind all this?" she asked me. "For me to even come here?"_

"_I thought since you were going to be here anyway, we could clear the air and be friends again," I told her._

"_You could have left me a fucking voicemail if that's all that you wanted from this," Beca snarled._

"_I wanted to see you," I said. "I missed you, Beca. I miss seeing my best friend."_

"_Friend?" she said and scoffed. "We confess that we're in love with each other, and you just want to be friends? God, Chloe, you really are something else."_

_Beca sat shaking her head, but wouldn't look at me. She wiped her eyes with her hands and finally looked at me._

"_What if I said I would move back here if that's what you wanted?" Beca said. "Because I will; just say the word, and it's done."_

"_I don't want you to do that."_

"_Why not?" Beca asked. "I love you, Chloe. I have loved you for years, and we have a chance at making something of this. Don't you want that, too?"_

_Things were getting out of hand, and Beca was getting angry. I didn't know what to say, so I just sat there. Beca's shoulders slumped, and her eyes changed; I could see the hurt and anger in them._

"_So, that's it," Beca spat out. "I spent the last three years being in love with you after you broke my heart to finally hear you say you love me, too, and you make me come back here only to break my heart again. What the fuck is wrong with you?"_

_People were starting to stare, so I said, "Let's go to my apartment, and we can talk about this."_

"_Why don't you want me to move here so we can be together?" Beca asked again. I sat frozen, not knowing how to answer her. "You know what? Never mind." Beca stood and looked at me. "Tell Aubrey I'm sorry I won't be able to see her. I'm leaving, and I don't want to see or hear from __**you**__ ever again."_

"_Beca, yo-you can't mean that," I said as tears poured down my face. "This isn't what I wanted."_

"_I guess neither one of us is going to get what they wanted," Beca said._

"And, before I could say anything else, she walked out," Chloe finished as the tears started again.

"NO!" Stacie yelled, startling Chloe. "You do not get to cry. You broke Beca's heart three years ago without meaning to. Now, when she comes here to talk things through, at your urging, I might add, you intentionally break her heart. So, no, you do not get to play the victim."

"Brey?" Chloe looked at Aubrey. "You understand why I had to tell her no, right?"

"I'm sorry, Chloe, I don't," Aubrey said. "You've spent the last three years pining over Beca and wishing she'd come back so you could tell her you're in love with her. You make plans to see her and tell her. You had to know if she came here, and you told her that you loved her, she would have wanted to have a real relationship with you. If that wasn't what you wanted, then you should have just explained what happened three years ago over the phone. Then you could have at least restarted your friendship. Now, you got nothing."

"I just wanted to see her so badly," Chloe said quietly.

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

It was late in the evening when Beca's anger at Chloe had melted away and left her feeling hurt. The past week, knowing she was finally going to be with Chloe, had her feeling freer and happier than she had felt since leaving Barden three years ago. She knew things were partially her fault. Based on what Chloe had told her over the phone, she had assumed Chloe wanted the same thing she did. She was blindsided when the redhead didn't want to attempt a real relationship with her. If that wasn't going to happen, what the Hell was she doing here?

Beca jumped up and looked around the room. She didn't want to be here. She had to get out of Barden and never look back. Coming back was a mistake, and if she stayed, she ran the risk of seeing Chloe again, and she didn't think she could handle that.

"I'll go to the airport and get on the first flight to LA," Beca muttered as she grabbed her suitcase and opened it on the bed. She started pulling her clothes off the hangers and emptying the dresser drawers, throwing everything into the suitcase.

Beca methodically went around the room, grabbing her stuff and placing it in the suitcase. The last thing she did was gather her toiletries from the bathroom.

Beca sat on the bed next to her packed suitcase. She put her hands to her head and wiped them down her face, and let out a heavy sigh.

"_I can't leave_," Beca thought. "_I promised Stacie I'd stay until the weekend. And I promised Aubrey I'd see her before I left._"

"Dammit, I can't go back on my promises," Beca said and pulled out her phone to send Stacie a text.

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

Chloe was lying curled up in her bed. Her mind racing at what had happened earlier that day. She was numb now; the tears had finally stopped a couple of hours ago. She could hear Aubrey and Stacie moving around in Aubrey's room as they got ready for bed.

Stacie was just climbing into bed when her phone pinged with a message. She reached over and grabbed it.

"It's late," Aubrey said. "Is everything okay?"

"It's from Beca," Stacie said. "She wants to talk and asked if I could come to her hotel. Like now."

"You should go," Aubrey said. "I'll talk to Chloe again. Maybe I can get her to get her head out of their ass and see that she and Beca belong together."

"I don't know, Brey," Stacie said. "Beca was really hurt that Chloe didn't want her the way she wanted Chloe."

"Chloe _**does**_ want her," Aubrey said. "She's just scared."

"Scared of what?" Stacie asked. "Scared of being loved? Scared of Beca's career? Scared of moving away from you? That's all bullshit, and you know it."

"She's afraid of it all," Aubrey said.

Stacie looked at Aubrey and shook her head.

"Okay," Stacie said. "I'll go talk to Beca and see if I can get her to talk to Chloe again. But, I swear, Brey, if Chloe says she wants Beca, she had better damn well mean it!"

"Fair enough," Aubrey said.

"I'll stay with Beca tonight," Stacie said. "I have a feeling we'll be up for quite some time."

"That's a good idea," Aubrey said. "I'll text you once I've talked to Chloe. Hopefully, I'll be asking you to bring Beca here with you so they can talk."

Stacie didn't say anything as she got up and dressed. She grabbed the overnight bag she had brought with her and kissed Aubrey goodbye.

"I love you," Aubrey called out when Stacie left her room. She smiled when Stacie stuck her head back in the room and said, "I love you, too."

With a wave, Stacie left. Aubrey ran a hand through her hair and sighed. She got up and went to Chloe's room and knocked softly.

"Yeah?" Chloe called out.

"Hey," Aubrey said as she stood in the open doorway. "Can we talk?"

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

Twenty minutes after leaving Aubrey, Stacie was knocking on Beca's hotel room door. Beca answered, and Stacie entered the room.

"Thanks for coming," Beca said.

"No problem," Stacie said. "Can I get something from the minibar?"

"Sure, help yourself," Beca said. "Grab me something, too, please."

Stacie dropped her bag by the door and went to the minibar and opened it. "You want vodka or scotch?"

"Scotch," Beca said.

Stacie grabbed two small bottles of scotch and two of vodka. She climbed onto the bed and sat next to Beca; both sat with their backs against the headboard. Stacie held out the bottles of scotch toward Beca; Beca took them and placed one on the nightstand next to the bed.

"Is, um, is Aubrey mad at me?" Beca asked, opening the scotch and downing it.

"Why would Brey be mad at you?" Stacie asked as she downed her vodka.

"I promised I'd come over and then didn't," Beca said.

"No, she's not mad at you," Stacie said. "So, what did you need to talk about?"

Beca let out a heavy sigh and said, "Chloe."

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

"I know what you're going to say," Chloe said as she sat up on her bed.

"Good, then I guess I can go back to bed," Aubrey said, turning as if to leave.

"Brey!" Chloe whined, causing Aubrey to turn back to her. "I need your help to fix this. I'm a mess."

"Maybe you need to think about what you want from Beca," Aubrey said as she sat on the edge of the bed. "And then talk to her."

"I want her," Chloe said, flopping down on the bed.

"Then why did you tell her you didn't want to move to LA or have her move here? Those are the only options for you and her to be together."

"Because I'm afraid."

"Of what? Finally getting what you've wanted for almost four years."

Chloe sat up and looked at Aubrey. "I'm afraid I'm not good enough for her."

"What are you talking about? Of course, you're good enough for her."

"But, she's famous now," Chloe said, staring down at her hands. "Remember how I told you those teenagers recognized her and asked her for an autograph?" Aubrey nodded. "She was so good with them, but they didn't even notice me. Can you imagine how things would be in LA where everyone knows who she is? I'd be just another face in the crowd."

"Chloe, if you and Beca were together," Aubrey said. "People would know who you are. You wouldn't just be another face in the crowd."

"Yes, I would," Chloe said adamantly. "I'm nobody special. I'm just me, and Beca is an award-winning music producer."

"Chloe Beale!" Aubrey said, grabbing Chloe's chin and forcing her to look at her. "I know you know how special you are. Beca loves you because of how special you are. Don't ever let me hear you say you're nobody special again. Do you hear me?"

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

"Chloe told Aubrey and me about your conversation," Stacie said. "Is that what you wanted to talk about?"

"Yeah," Beca said. "I can't figure out what changed in a week. She told me in the letters she loved me, she told me she loved me when we met earlier. I thought we were getting somewhere and then suddenly she wanted me as only a friend. I don't get it."

"Oh, Beca," Stacie said, putting an arm around her shoulders. "She does want you. Brey said she's afraid. And, before you ask, she doesn't exactly know what Chloe's afraid of; she just knows she's afraid."

"What am I supposed to do, Stacie?" Beca asked, banging her head back on the headboard. "I was doing a fairly decent job of ignoring her and moving on. I thought she wanted me here to become something." Beca sighed and hung her head. "I think I just want to go home."

"No," Stacie said. "Not going to happen. You promised me you'd stay the whole week no matter what happened with Chloe, and you promised Brey you'd see her while you were here. The Beca Mitchell I'm friends with does not break a promise."

"Fine," Beca said. "Text Aubrey and see if we can meet for dinner tomorrow if you're free."

"We're free," Stacie said. "Um, should I invite Chloe?"

"No," Beca shakes her head. "I don't think I'll be ready to talk to her by then."

"Okay," Stacie said. "I'll make a reservation and text you the place. Now, I'm going to get us some adult-sized bottles of alcohol and be right back."

"Want me to order some snacks from room service while you're gone?"

"Yes," Stacie said as she walked out the door.

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

Chloe nodded her head at Aubrey and laid back down on her bed. Aubrey looked at her.

"Where did the lack of confidence come from?" Aubrey asked. "You've always been a very confident person. What's changed?"

"Beca saying she loved me," Chloe said. "The illusion of one day Beca telling me was shattered by the reality of her actually telling me. I had this vision in my head of Beca coming here and sweeping me off my feet. She would tell me she loved me, and then we'd ride off into the sunset."

"It sounds like that's what Beca was trying to do," Aubrey said. "You're the one who shattered the reality when you pushed her away instead of trying to work it out."

"I know," Chloe said softly. "But, I've messed it up for good. I wanted her, but everything I said contradicted that. She'll never want to see me again."

Aubrey heard her phone ringing from her room.

"Hold that thought," Aubrey said and jumped up and ran into her bedroom. She saw Stacie's name on the caller ID and grabbed the phone.

"Hey," Aubrey said, breathlessly.

"_Hey_," Stacie responded. "_Just wanted to check in before Beca and I started drinking._"

"Is Beca ready to talk to Chloe again?"

"_Not yet. But she did ask if you wanted to have dinner tomorrow night. Just us three."_

"That's fine. Maybe we can convince her to come home with us and talk to Chloe._"_

"_Maybe. At least I hope so. I'll see you sometime in the morning. I'll text you when I'm on my way."_

"Okay," Aubrey said. "I love you!_"_

"_I love you, too," _Stacie said and ended the call.

Aubrey let out a sigh and went back to Chloe's room. "I'm sorry, Chloe," Aubrey said. "Stacie said Beca's not ready to talk to you, yet. It's not much, but at least she didn't say she never wants to talk to you again."

"I guess," Chloe said. "I'm tired and want to go to bed."

"Okay," Aubrey said. "Goodnight, Chloe."

"Goodnight," Chloe said.

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

Stacie woke the next morning only slightly hungover. She heard Beca moaning and groaning next to her and looked over. Stacie laughed and called Beca a lightweight.

"I hate you," Beca groaned.

"No, you don't," Stacie said. "Let's order breakfast. It will help with the hangover."

"You order it," Beca said, her voice muffled by her pillow.

"Fine," Stacie said and walked over to the desk to look at the menu.

A note lying on the desk caught Stacie's eye. She picked it up, and her eyes widened. She read it twice to make sure she was sure about what she was reading.

"Beca! Get up," Stacie yelled as she grabbed her bag and threw it on the bed.

"No," Beca mumbled. "Not until the food is here."

"We'll get food at Aubrey's," Stacie said. "Now get your ass up, or I swear I will drag you out of here just the way you are."

Beca's head popped up, and she looked over her shoulder at Stacie. "I'm not going over _there_."

"Yes, you are," Stacie said, pulling off her shirt. "You need to talk to Chloe and tell her everything you wrote in that letter."

"Shit!" Beca muttered, swallowing loudly. "You, uh, you saw the letter?"

"Yes," Stacie said. "Now, get dressed."

Stacie pulled on a pair of jeans and a plain tee. Beca hadn't moved, so she grabbed Beca by the leg and started pulling her off the bed.

"Ahhhh," Beca screamed. "Stop! Stop! I'm getting up. Sheesh! Do you manhandle Aubrey like that?"

Beca stood by the bed, and Stacie glared at her through narrowed eyes.

"Okay, okay," Beca said, moving to the dresser. "I'll get dressed."

It didn't take long for the two brunettes to dress and hurry out of the hotel. Stacie got behind the wheel of her car and texted Aubrey that she and Beca were on their way over.

_**~~ Letters I've Written ~~**_

Aubrey was sitting on the sofa, drinking a cup of coffee while waiting for Stacie and Beca. She heard Stacie's key in the door and stood.

"Stop, it Stacie," Beca said, trying to get out of Stacie's grip.

"Sit down and be quiet, you," Stacie said, giving Beca a shove toward the sofa.

"Your girlfriend is a rude, overbearing bitch," Beca told Aubrey as she went to sit on the sofa.

"Watch her," Stacie told Aubrey. "I'll be right back."

Beca flipped Stacie as she headed toward Chloe's bedroom.

"What's going on?" Aubrey asked, looking at Beca.

"I got drunk last night and wrote Chloe a letter," Beca said, not looking at Aubrey. "Stacie found it and said Chloe needed to read it."

"And you're going to let her?"

"Hell, no!" Beca said. "Stacie manhandled me all the way over here and is going to give it to her."

Aubrey put her hand up to her mouth to hide her smile. Stacie came back into the living room and kissed Aubrey.

"Is there any coffee?" Stacie asked.

"Yeah," Aubrey said. "Come on, Beca. Oh, it's good to see you."

Beca smiled. "It's good to see you, too."

Beca hugged Aubrey and held on for a minute. "Your girlfriend, on the other hand, no so happy to see."

"You love her," Aubrey said, smacking Beca on the shoulder.

"That is...very true," Beca said as she entered the kitchen.

"Did Chloe say anything about the letter?" Aubrey asked.

"I didn't talk to Chloe," Stacie said. "I knocked on the door, shoved the envelope under it, and hurried back in here."

"Did she get it?" Beca asked, causing Stacie to look at her with a raised eyebrow.

"I thought you didn't want me to give it to her," Stacie said.

"Well, I thought, you know, since I'm here," Beca said. "She may as well read it."

Stacie smiled. "Well, if she saw it and decided to read it, we should be seeing her rush out here in about…"

"Brey! Brey!" Chloe's voice called out. "Where are you?"

"Now," Stacie finished with a smile.

"Kitchen!" Aubrey called back.

"Brey, can you call Stacie? I need to find out where Beca is stay-" Chloe stopped as she entered the kitchen and saw Beca sitting there with Stacie and Aubrey. "Oh."

"Good morning, Chloe," Stacie said.

"Um, hey, good morning, Stacie," Chloe said. "I, uh, Becs, I didn't know you were here."

"Um, yeah," Beca said. "Stacie made me come."

"Oh," Chloe said, somewhat disappointed as she looked down at the letter in her hand.

"But I wanted to," Beca said quickly, standing and walking over to Chloe. "I think we should talk."

"Were you serious about what you asked in this letter?" Chloe asked, holding the letter up.

Beca looked at Aubrey and Stacie. Stacie smiled and nodded her head, mouthing, "Go ahead, tell her."

Beca nodded.

"Use your words, Beca," Aubrey said.

"Go away, Aubrey," Beca said, flipping her off behind her back. She turned to Chloe and took her hand. "I'm serious, Chlo. I want us to be together forever. I don't have a ring but," Beca gets down on one knee. Stacie and Aubrey both look on, smiling. "Will you marry me?"

Beca, let out a small yelp as Chloe tightened her grip on Beca's hand and pulled her up and smashed their lips together.

"It's about time," Stacie said.

"It's kind of fast," Aubrey said.

Beca pulled back from the kiss, smiling. "Can I take that as a yes?"

"Yes, definitely a yes," Chloe said. She turned to Aubrey. "It's not too fast, Brey. I know that despite my fears, it was destined to happen; it's just a bit sooner than I expected."

Beca pulled Chloe into another kiss, and this time it didn't end until Aubrey cleared her throat.

"We should go to breakfast to celebrate," Aubrey said.

"Can we celebrate together at dinner?" Beca asked. "Chloe and I need to talk about a few things."

"Okay," Aubrey said. "Dinner it is."

"Come on, Becs," Chloe said, grabbing Beca's hand. "You can help me pick out something to wear."

Beca and Chloe left and went to Chloe's bedroom.

"I'll fix us some breakfast," Aubrey said.

Stacie said okay and picked up the letter Chloe had dropped in all the excitement. Aubrey walked over and looked over Stacie's shoulder.

"_Dear Chloe_," Aubrey read. "_Despite everything that's happened, I still love you and will love you forever. I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?_ That's it? That's all she wrote."

"That's all she needed to write."


End file.
